City Craft Beers | City Craft Beers
Sexy beer photos, Bullshit beer reviews and the best craft beer t-shirts you've seen since lunch.
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This beer has great city.

Don’t get it?  Have another pint and it will come to you.


Why does this site exist? Good question.

Because I fancy producing softcore beer porn and inane scribblings about the craft beer industry by taking the piss out of it all with….



Bullshit Beer Reviews

Most beer reviews are moronic at best.  There are far too many halfwits throwing around buzzwords and poo-pooing on hard working and talented brewers.  That’s dumb, so I do it like this.  Which, is also dumb.

  • I have to say I'm digging Spinnakers more and more these days. It's been a while since they've been in my fridge. However this one put a smile on my face. It makes me smile almost as much as when this morning my three year old daughter yelled "daddy LOOK at me. I have a BAGYNA!"

    Been smiling all day.

    Pairs well with the Naked Gun.

    Rating: 🍭/10

a few recent reviews

Goings on

By that I mean events I happen to go to

(occasionally news, articles, profiles, recipes etc.)


Food & Booze Event Photography

Are you hosting or promoting an event?  It’s always great to come away from a whiz-bang good time with a whack ton of dazzling photos for your social media and promotional materials.

Uhmm… yes, gorgeous photos for my event please.
(more info)

Who's driving this boat?

Matty Profile 2017


Matty Schmitz

Founder | Photographer | Word Slinger

Pretty much ever since I was a kid I had a passion for photography. HAH! Yeah right. What a line that is. When I was a kid I had a passion for Play Doh and Lik-M-Aid Fun Dips.


I did eventually figure out what all those buttons on my Nikon do and in the process, I fell in love with the craft beer scene. I’ve been shoving my camera in front of people’s drinks ever since.



For photography service inquiries, beers you’d like to see reviewed or just to say I love you…. drop me a line.  Cheers!